Tuesday, August 7, 2012

An 8 year blessing...

8 years ago today I married a man.  

We had our dreams, but still I did not know what the future held for us.  We wanted children together but knew this may not be easy.  I had a previous marriage & children with me; he had none.  This alone brought its own obstacles & complications.

There were many unknowns ahead of us, but what I did know without a doubt is that God had brought us together.

When there has been disappointing relationships in our past, or the opposite, years of loneliness and searching, I think it is quite natural to wish we'd met our other halves sooner. However both hubby & I recognized we had met each other at the right time. Although there are events in my past I wish I'd never had to experience, hubby was having his own journey and if I'd met him sooner I would not have liked him, been attracted to him or given him a second glance.  As it was it was only through the will of God that we made it past our second date :-/

Aside from the fruit our marriage has produced, there are many other reasons to congratulate ourselves on 8 years of marriage.  There was a time where it seemed I could not sustain a meaningful relationship for more than two years, and the one that lasted 3 years didn't just finish, it went horribly wrong.  But it brought me to God, and ultimately brought me to my hubby.

We came together at a time when God had decided we were both 'ready' for each other. But don't misunderstand me, we by no means consider ourselves 'finished' or 'perfect'.  But we brought with us everything we had learned previously, as well the hope of everything we still longed for, and we trusted that together God would bless us with those things.

We have bad days, we've experienced bad years; but we've also experienced great joy & there have been times where honestly I did not expect my husbands best but he far exceeded everything I needed but dared not hope for.  I hope I still not only surprise him but exceed his expectations of me.

During the not so good times I struggle.  But I always bring myself (and my mind) back to Gods promise.  He brought us together, He has a plan for our lives, His intention is to bless us not harm us, as long as I'm walking with God he will guide us gently along His path for our marriage, not our own.  And everything hubby & I experience together good or bad brings about a greater sense of intimacy.  People may think they know him, they may think they know me, but at the end of the day my husband is privy to the most private in & outs of my day, and I to his.     

Greater than this is the intimacy of God in my heart.  When I feel I cannot speak freely with my husband for whatever reason, when we are separated (which is often as hubby works away) God is my greatest companion, my closest friend & confidant.  He knows the inner most workings of my heart, the secrets that will never pass my lips to anyone.  Because of Gods love for me, His understanding, and His patience I can love my husband even when he is not perfect, even when he does not say the right things.  Because God extends His grace to me daily, I can extend grace & mercy to my husband.

I have surprised even myself that I have been able to nurture this relationship for so long; I am not known for my lengthy attention span hence my nickname 8-second-ali. It is only with God in my life that I have sustained interest in being married.  I know that may sound horrible, but there will be women reading this nodding their heads knowing exactly what I am talking about.  There are days when I'd rather just walk away from my marriage than have to deal with it another minute.  I imagine dancing to the beat of my own drum & having the time & peace to bask in Gods love for me.... Except God wants me to honour my promise to my husband, which is ultimately a promise to God himself.  God asks me to treasure my marriage as sacred & I promised Him I would when I took my vows.  God asks me to have FAITH that He is working a miracle in my marriage, in my husband, in myself even when I can not see it in the natural... He is working this miracle in the SUPERnatural.  :-)

Every day we stand firm on Gods promise for our marriage is a victory against the enemy who would like nothing better than to tear our marriage & family apart.  

This is how we celebrate 8 years of marriage.  It may not be with a party or dinner. In fact we spend this anniversary apart, as we have on others. 

But we are together in Christ. And that is the greatest celebration of all. :-)


"Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.  Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her  to make her holy,cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself."

 Ephesians 5:21-28


  1. Gorgeous Ali, one of my favourite songs (and the song I walked down the aisle to) goes like this:

    "Every long lost dream led me to where you are, others who broke my heart they were like northern stars pointing me on my way into your loving arms...this much I know is true - that God blessed the broken road that led me straight to you."

    Many blessings and congratulations on 8 wonderful years of marriage <3

  2. Yesterday was my first anniversary of being with Luke. Thank you for writing something I have known in my heart for years and now - by the grace of God - have and enjoy.

    Kisses dear sister.